After hours of deliberation and discussion regarding our future, you'll be happy to know, Cheryl and I have decided to see this through. She and I have worked it out and she totally forgives me for being "insensitive about her feelings." I know now that birthdays are "special" and that I should be more "attentive" to her "needs." I know all these words about feelings and caring and understanding make me sound a little soft and effeminate, but it really wouldn't matter what she asked me to do, I'd be game. If Cheryl Cole suggested I run naked through troughs of fat tailed scorpions while Austrailian Aborigines threw razor blade boomerangs at my genitals, I'd think, "How did I get so lucky to have such an understanding and reasonable girl?" I would answer back to myself in a low confident voice, God only knows, Trey. God only knows."
