Leo, you S.O.B.

A couple of weeks ago, when average Americans, and Seal Team Six, were busy relishing in the death of the world's most evil man, Leonardo DiCaprio was breaking up with his Israeli supermodel girlfriend of many years. Many thought this would be the girl to tame his unquenchable thirst for beautiful woman. For the record, I am not one of those people. Number one, she just doesn't do it for me. Number two, he is pretty much a bad ass and knows almost all of Victoria's Secrets. I'm not sure if it was the chicken or the egg, meaning was it Blake that caused the break up, but based on her reputation among the circles of Hollywood, you damn right she's the cause. She has loose morals and loves the crap out of being famous and will do just about anything or anybody to stay there. And also, Jesus, she's beautiful. Regardless, it appears Leo agrees cause this week he's in Cannes France, on some yacht, with Blake Freaking Lively. If that doesn't make you want to hate your life nothing will. I would live for two years with the Taliban and OJ Simpson for ten minutes of naked wrestling with Blake Lively.

Tom Cruise's couch jumping days are over...Knight and Day will be a big hit.

Some people on this Earth just have "it". I hate to say it. It actually pains me to say it, but Tom Cruise is one of those guys. Wednesday night I went to see Knight and Day and granted, the movie isn't a Soderbergh or a Chrisotpher Nolan, but what it is is fun and damn entertaining. I didn't even want to like Tom Cruise, but I couldn't help it. He was engaging, surprisingly charismatic and very funny. If you're looking for something to walk away from inspired or intrigued, even sad or confused, trust me, this isn't it. In fact, save your money for Inception or The Adjustment Bureau if that's what you're looking for. But if you're looking for something mindless, something upbeat, something more summer-ish, Knight and Day will deliver on a platter to you 2 hours and 10 minutes of just plain fun. The only thing I could have done without is Cameron Diaz's stupid laugh, wrinkly face, and her oddly-shaped man torso. I don't like girls with that V angling down from their obliques like Cristiano Rinaldo. If I wanted my girl to look like a dude, I'd just date a dude, but I don't cause I'm not. Take for instance, Helen of Troy, you don't see dude abs. You just see an impeccably shaped specimen of sexuality and reproductive fitness. She's so sexy, I once knocked her up from another state. True Story.