Wait, God, wh...what?

Fame whore, Father(?), professional media chaser, Michael Lohan, jumped at the opportunity to comment on his daughter's most recent arrest and imprisonment:

"As you know, thank God, Lindsay was released from jail tonight. However, what what most don't know is that her release wasn't due to the efforts of any one person. She was released because that's what God wanted.

That's really funny because when I look at the pics above, God must really want her to have herpes and a heroin habit too. This useless dipshit couldn't find a purpose for life if she spent a month with God and the Dalai Lama saving orphans from leprosy and curing cancer. It's funny how Hollyweird works, because I bet like Marilyn, if she OD's and checks out prematurely, people will spend the next 50 years talking about how great and what a trend setter she was and how her impact shaped the fashion world and what a poor victim she was. Let's face it, we've all seen Monroe movies and she was awful. If it weren't for her banging every Kennedy in Massachusetts, her ridiculous dress lifting publicity stunts, and especially her overdose, she would be as forgettable as Pamela Anderson. Lohan will be no different. The irony of Hollywood is no one will touch Lindsay Lohan now because she's box office poison. Let her die though and those same people will talk about how her genius was cut so short by drugs, alcohol and the fast lane of Hollywood. Gosh, Hollywood sucks my ass.

You've got to be GD kidding me...

I'm no paragon, but I can assure you my shoes don't sneeze cocaine. Seriously, can't cops do something about this? I get pulled over for rolling stop signs and this chick uses cocaine smokescreens like ninjas to evade the paparazzi when she leaves the clubs. It would seem hard to believe that someone so broke and exiled from the Hollywood inner circle would have the money to feed such a habit, so the only other option would be Gold Bond Medicated Powder. But that doesn't seem so likely either because if any medication is likely to be dripping off or following her like a cloud, it would be have to be Aldara, Valtrex, or HIV cocktails. It's sad to think about, but I wonder if Vegas has odds on the over/under for her overdose.