You mean we're not stupid?

WASHINGTON (CNN) – For the first time since he took over in the White House, Americans don't see eye to eye with President Barack Obama on the important issues, according to a new national poll. But the CNN/Opinion Research Corporation survey does indicate that a majority approve of how Obama's handling his duties as president.

According to the poll, which was released Tuesday, 48 percent of people questioned say that they agree with Obama on the issues that matter most to them, with 51 percent saying no. That's a switch from April, when 57 percent said they agreed with the president on important issues, with 41 percent disagreeing.

"Obama is facing crunch time on a number of controversial issues, from health care to financial regulation to cap and trade to Afghanistan," says CNN Polling Director Keating Holland. "The fact that most Americans no longer agree with him on important issues makes his task harder."

Could there be hope that America has started to see through the celebrity smokescreen? If a CNN poll is reporting this, one has to assume that it's probably even more drastic. America doesn't want larger government control. America doesn't want their health care rationed by the Federal Government. People doesn't want their taxes increased to fund failing government programs like Medicare, Health Reform and Social Security. If you're one of the people that doesn't see the ineptitude in government run programs and organizations, get a cancerous tumor in a government health care facility and you'll find out real quick. The truth is, America is tired of party politics. We were all sick of George Bush and his administration, but just when we thought it couldn't get worse, Obama was elected. Since then, he's completely buried this country in debt from excessive, frivolous and ineffeicient spending to fund an expanding Federal Government and a far left Socialist ideology. After an energy bill that penalizes corporations through higher taxes hidden in pointless environmental penalties, his focus has been on a government controlled Health Care Reform Bill that burdens the American taxpayer into apathy and mediocrity. These are not the principles America was founded on, nor are they the prinicples of the working people of today's America. If you decide that receiving handouts from a government that passes legislation to keep you dependent and poor is easier than working, you deserve what you get. Your government is essentially buying your vote by offering you an insulting stipend that keeps you perpetually dependent, helpless, and brainwashed into being loyal to a party that does nothing but prey on your thirst for more empty promises and your government induced poverty. How could a party that promises to take care of the "misfortunate" actually benefit from bringing you out of poverty? That's rhetorical because they wouldn't; therefore, keeping you dependent and hungry for handouts epitomizes the foundation for the Democratic party's agenda and power seeking ideology. If you're not pissed off at the party that hates and discredits you, you've obviously given up on life. I've always heard you can take the top 75% of wealthy Americans and give it to the bottom 25% and in a matter of time, the numbers would be right back where they started. I can believe it.

Oh my loins...

Tricia Helfer is single handedly responsible for the sexiest Playboy spread...ever. Well, I guess that's not hard since Tara Reid is in this month's issue. Seriously though, I'm surprised Battlestar Galactica isn't the most successful show ever produced. If this chick got naked once per episode, the coveted 18-35 demo would be a no-brainer. If Tricia Helfer was red on the roulette wheel and STD's, prison rape, and castration were every other number and color, I would cash in my life savings and play all night for one chance.

Florida...where pedophiles and murderers go to expand their careers

Somer Thompson was released from Grove Park Elementary School in Grove Park, in Orange Park, FL at 2:50 p.m. She was with her twin brother, her 10-year-old sister and friends when she reportedly ran ahead of them after getting into a fight. Her brother and sister said she was not at home when they arrived at 3:05 p.m.

Somer's mother's boyfriend searched up and down the block for her when she didn't come home; her mother called home at 4 p.m. to check on the kids and immediately called authorities.

Clay County Sheriff Rick Beseler said officers are investigating whether Somer's disappearance is connected to an event that happened in the area on Oct. 10, when three people unsuccessfully tried to lure a 5-year-old girl into a car.

"We want to emphasize while we're taking this into consideration, we are not focusing just on this … we're exploring other areas and angles,” Beseler said.

He said 57 sex offenders have been interviewed within a 3-mile radius, and their homes and yards have been searched. The search was expanded Tuesday to a 5-mile radius, and officials say they will interview 30 more registered sex offenders.

"She is an endangered, missing child." Mahla said. "It would be very tough for her to survive [given her age, location and conditions outside], so we suspect foul play."

Thompson is white, 3 feet 5 inches tall and weighs 65 pounds. She has brown hair that was in a pony tail and was wearing a cranberry colored jumpsuit with pink stripes and a black T-shirt underneath. Her backpack is black with pink and white skulls and crossbones.

People are encouraged to call the tip line at (877) 227-6911 with any additional information on the child’s whereabouts.


God help this beautiful little girl.

I lived in this hell. Did I read they're interviewing 57 sex offenders in a 3 mile radius? 87 in five miles? WTF? I knew Florida was bad, but there can't be any neighbors that aren't sex offenders. If your effed up sexual exploits involve children and other illegalities, go to hell. Second, I hope you burn or die in prison a painful death. Third, if you move to Florida, you're no longer a minority.

Kissed by an angel................of death.

If I were 23 years OLD and this were my face, I would wonder what deal I lost with the devil while I was slipped Rohypnol. This is a prime example of what penises, blow, and alcohol will do to you. This must be the new diet for young Hollywood starlets that want to sabotage their own careers.

OMG you look, like, so skinny! I can totally see your eye sockets!

OMG thank you. Yeah, like, I know. I...I...I...I....oh yeah...like I just started the new PBA diet.

OMG...no you didn't? The Penis Blow Alcohol? You're like so lucky!

I know, right? I haven't eaten in like 4 days!

OMG. Sooo jealous!

Recession hits Christmas morning...

It seems as though the credit crunch, subsequent recession and rising unemployment has trickled its way down to Christmas gifts for children. While opening Hula Hoops, Transformers, baby dolls and GI Joe's might be fun for kids, they're apparently sending the wrong message. What's important in today's economy is learning a trade and polishing your skill set until you can market that trade. Although I gotta question your parental skills when you're career encouragement is focused on your kids being janitors. Nothing wrong with being a janitor, but when you're a kid aren't you told you can be anything...even President? In the words of Boortz, I know everyone can't be a doctor or a lawyer...somebody's gotta fry the fries. I say if you're gonna lay this out there, your kid being a janitor and all, at least give him/her all the tools of the trade. Go buy thirty keys, a key chain, and a jumpsuit. BTW, if you buy this for your son and he smiles like this kid while he vacuums and cleans, you should've gotten the Barbie doll...something tells me he would've been happier.

Do you see the resemblance?

After the recent performance of the disaster that was Jennifer's Body, it seems Megan Fox's arrogant ass may have been rightfully humbled a bit. At the 2009 Scream Awards, Megan attempted to set the record straight about the ungrateful and negative comments surrounding Michael Bay and the Transformer series, which btw, is the reason she isn't in a trailer or porn.

US Magazine reports:

"I don't usually do this, but I wanted to say something," she began. "There have been a lot of false reports about how I feel about this movie. I just want to be very clear that I've always felt I'm a very ordinary part of an extraordinary film."
She added that "the movie took me out of obscurity and gave me a career, and I'm completely grateful to everyone involved with this franchise."

Grateful to everyone? I remember just two months ago you related Michael Bay to Hitler in one breath and poked fun of Transformers in the other. The truth is, Megan Fox makes enemies everywhere she goes...with the exception of her Vietnamese eyebrow waxer. Before Jennifer's body premiered, she was one of the most sought after actresses in Hollywood. Since then, we realized she can't act worth shit and even her bisexual kissing scene couldn't help Jennifer's Body bring in much more than 16 million dollars. To put that in perspective, Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself, did 51 million. I could market Michael Moore nude in a movie and bring in more money than Jennifer's Body. Ha ha you suck Megan Fox.

Models are so easy...enjoyable...

5:30pm

Alessandra comes to the door in a black dress that really acceentuates her gorgeous slender figure. I give her a very confident yet conservative kiss on the cheek and tell her how beautiful she looks. Our red carpet event will start in one hour...just enough time to have some champagne in the limo to loosen things up.

6:50

Alessandra walks the carpet and I keep a few steps back while I honor Mila Kunis' request for my phone number. The evening is rolling along nicely at this point. We go inside and mingle, but I can tell her focus is elsewhere. Somewhere at this point, she leans over in an accent I could barely understand and says she's ready to go. I don't hesitate. With her arm enveloped in mine, we walk straight to the limo and resume our champagne.


8:30

Alessandra and I sit in the back room and our table backs up against the privacy fence. She leans against the table, her hands under the table and gripped tightly around mine. I feel uncomfortable and trapped, but I go with it. We open our second bottle of red wine with dinner. I have fish, she has salad.

9:30

We order dessert, I have a Manhattan and she, a Cockburns Port 1963. The sexual tension is ripping off the tablecloth at this point, but I'm losing interest because so much is lost in translation. Most of my dessert is spent intently trying to decipher her thickened accent exacerbated by the copious libations. She's beginning to annoy me, but she's too pretty to give up now.

10:21pm

Alessandra is complaining about how her feet hurt. She stops and attempts to take off her shoes, but I urge her not to. We start walking again toward the limo. A few paparazzi are following and she gets closer as she slides her arm inside mine. She leans over and I think she said something sexy, but I have no clue what she said. I look at her, smile and laugh. She smiles. "Tshe thays tshe can't wait fur the rrride home." I'm giddy with excitement. As we approach the limo, I open the door for her, slide my hand to the small of her back and guide her inside by the hand. I think she thanked me, but I can't be sure. She leans a little too far over, or actually just far enough and slides into the opposite side of the car. I hear her say softly, "Get in papai." Of course, that's Portuguese for Daddy. I turn around wink to the paparazzi and close the door.

Damn you Britney...Damn You!

It is with the most regret ever recorded that I write these words---Britney Spears in a bikini piques my Willy's interest. I don't really want it to, but it's a primal thing I can't control. From 1998-2003 this girl occupied roughly 78% of every fantasy I had that didn't involve Laetitia Casta or Heidi Klum. You know, even now, as sad as her life is, if you could take off that dead squirrel weave, remove just a couple hundred white trash dudes off her "list", and I'd give her a good inbred Louisiana pounding. I guess it just goes to show you that men control the world. I know this is sexist, but if you think about a girl like Britney Spears being worth 100 million dollars, to what else could you attribute that? It's certainly not her intelligence, her wit, or her philanthropies. Actually I can only think of one thing she offers and that one thing is something that most women aren't interested in. Sex sells and it's sold to men because we want it. It's sold to women because they know we want it. Regardless, If You Seek Amy.

Kim Catrall is sexy

I'm not sure how or why this girl is always in pictures. Other than one role on Nip/Tuck, the year it turned to sh#t, I couldn't name one thing she does. She's essentially a professional paparazzi notifier of her location. Only Speidi does it better than she does. She tries to be sexy, but everything she does backfires. She's like Jessica Simpson's career, but in human form. She's like 21, but looks 40 at least. If you're 21 and your face looks like a wax figure of yourself, things aren't going well for you. Watching this train wreck flaunt her claymation mug on the red carpet is painful. I don't know if Hollywood is just really this awful, or I just never noticed before.

Does anyone really care?

Thank Jesus Rihanna decided to Twitter the release date for her new album.


The wait is over? Really?!? YES!!! Finally!!! I'm so excited!!!
Just kidding, you suck.

For the love of God, just please go away, you self-absorbed punching bag. No one cares about your stupid costumes, your constant camera starvation, your magnificent choices in men, or your pathetic music.

MOMMY!!!!!

The press says this is Rose McGowan, but I think it might be a serpant of death. In fact, if I opened my closet door, as I do every night to check for monsters, and this hideous creature was staring at me, I would fall straight back onto the floor assuming the angel of death aka that black shadow that came for all the bad people in Ghost, was sent for me. I bet if you checked Rose's garage, you would find she doesn't have a car; instead, a black chariot constantly engulfed in flames pulled by floating horses of hell.

Bless her heart...

Jessica Simpson is like a stupidity ninja.

"Daisy meant the world to me," she told Usmagazine.com at a QVC event in NYC Tuesday. "I hold her memory very, very close. It was an unfortunate thing what happened. That I don't have her every day ... It's a very hard thing to talk about."

The 5-year-old Malti-Poo went missing on Sept. 14 in Los Angeles. That night, she created a missing dog poster that read "I Miss My Mommy ... Daisy" all over her neighborhood. After a frantic weeks-long search, Simpson gave up.

Simpson has mixed feelings on whether she'll buy another dog, but she's sure how Daisy would feel about it. "I haven't really thought about another dog yet, but maybe sometime. [Daisy] would want that."

Daisy would want that? I miss my mommy? WTF is she talking about? Her dog would want that? No she wouldn't. Her dog doesn't give 2 shits. All dogs want is to be cared for aka (BE FED), and have sex with another dog if they still have their working parts, your leg if they don't. Being taken out is optional because they'll be more than happy to drop a deuce on your floor or pee on the fake ficus tree in the corner. Jessica Simpson is so dumb, I'm surprised she can carry out normal daily activities. It wouldn't shock me if some mornings she uses hair gel for tooth paste and q-tips for tampons. Dating her would be like dating a dalmation. They're beautiful to look at, but you know at any second they're going to truly amaze you with their overwhelming propensity for doing and saying stupid things.

Identity crisis circa 1990

When I was younger, I really really wanted to be African American. I don't mean that offensively. I mean, I truly did. I think that's the normal right of passage every run-of-the-mill suburban white kid goes through. When Kid-n-Play were popular and House Party was all the rage, I wanted Kid's hair more than you can imagine. I used to think about having a tall box cut like Kid, but hollowing out the inside and putting a plastic cover on top of it where you could store your pencils and other sundry items one might need throughout the day. Well, alas, I'm never gonna have hair that cool. I'm never gonna win a dance off like Kid does in House Party. I guess I'll just live as the run-of-the-mill suburbian who aspires to be more receptive and adaptable to pop culture trends.

I'm not so sure another 12 pack is a good idea...

Someone that looks almost as trashy as Kid Rock hopefully walked to a covenient store and spent 10 minutes trying to get from the back of the store to the front. Many of you might not have 10 minutes of your lives to waste on this, but if you do, this video is priceless. Drunks are just so gosh darn silly.

Hey Will Ferrell, Screw You (Part II)

Hopefully more people think the way these people and I do. Celebrities are among the most overexposed people on Earth. Most are hardly qualified for anything, yet life seems to bow at their feet in adoration. Call it cynicism, bitterness, or anger, but if you're stupid enough to take your opinions from people like Will Ferrell and Sean Penn, your reproductive rights should be stripped by our Federal Government. The inability to assess our nation's key issues, formulate your own opinions and articulate your own solution without referring to Funnyordie.com just furthers my point that as time goes by, smart people are being massively outbred by individuals renting in the proverbial bowels of humankind's mental capicity.

I bet this country couldn't care less about their "international image"

I love being an American. I love this country more than anything in the world. I love capitalism. I love our Republic. I love capital punishment following the conviction by a jury of your peers. I love our Constitution. I love freedom. I love being burdened with the responsibility of challenging and questioning our leaders and lawmakers. Out of all those things, nowhere did I mention the constant and incessant concern with being viewed favorably on the international stage. Nowhere in that lexicon of the American Republic did I profess my dedication to treating godless and savage enemies with respect, nor do I understand engaging the enemy only when enaged first. I wish this flag would go to vote. It's the flag of the Benin Empire, a pre-colonial African state situated in modern Nigeria that lasted from 1440 until 1897. I say we just get rid of the subtleties. If you want to fly planes into our buildings, kill thousands of our working people on a gorgeous Tuesday morning, decimate our economy, we'll do to you just as you do...cut your heads off and keep your severed heads in pig pens for seven days. I'm so completely sick of constantly being told how we need to be sensitive to our enemies and their way of life. I'm tired of sending our men and women to fight a faceless and godless enemy with their hands tied by a thousand rules of engagement. Do we need to be reminded who punched first? Do we need to be reminded of Vietnam and how war goes when our guns are taken out of our troop's hands? It's either time to fight or time to admit failure because cutting our losses is ignoring the thousands of dead young men and women fallen at the foot of our proud flag. We need a new mantra. We need new leadership. We need a renewed sense of America. We need to return to the 1985 swagger where there were no apologies for democracy and capitalism. We need to return to the time when opposing a smothering Communism wasn't merely tolerated, it was encouraged. I've had it with our out-of-touch members of Congress and President assuming we're too stupid to know the difference. I bet 2010 will prove otherwise. I think Americans have a lot to say and I for one, am licking my chops.

This one will never be topped...ever.

MI SUK YANG.

I'll give you one guess why this name is applicable to exposedandnaked.


Authorities have arrested a 46-year-old Marietta woman after she reportedly made a provocative proposition to a person she thought was a massage client.

Mi Suk Yang, an employee of a south Forsyth County massage parlor, was arrested Sept. 17 by the Forsyth County Sheriff's Office and charged with solicitation of prostitution, authorities said. She was released later that day after posting a $605 bond.

Sheriff's Lt. Col. Gene Moss said investigators decided to look into operations at Sun Sauna Spa, 1408 Atlanta Hwy. near Redi Road, after receiving complaints from the public about possible illegal activity.

"This business is also under review by the county licensing department for further action," Moss said, adding that the sheriff's office is not authorized to shut down the business.

I live in Forsyth county and to admit that this news story alluded me, is just embarassing. I live for shit like this. The truth about this story is that opening weekend of college football season, my buddy Jason and I drove past Green Spa and actually verbalized how positive we were that it was without a doubt an establishment that would offer rub and tugs. In fact, we skeptical massages even took place. The front of the business had black film over the glass that was completely inpenatrable to light. Little did we know it would offer us one of the most ironic and iconic criminals of all time, MI SUK YANG. My friends have to travel to Thailand for stories like this and I had my own story waiting just three short miles away. It just proves when life has you down and things just aren't going your way, doors open and Mi Suk Yang is there to brighten your day.

Pretty sure the heart attack would kill me first.

This, coupled with a massive amount of jean shorts and Lynryd Skynyrd bumper stickers are just two of the many reasons I left the city of Jacksonville. Near St Augustine, Florida in St John's County, this Eastern Diamondback rattlesnake was killed a couple of weeks ago. The snake was 7'3" long. Although not a record, would produce a record in my pants if I stumbled across this monster. In true Jacksonville fashion, the trapper gave the snake to a man who runs a muffler shop...and also makes things from skin(WTF?). He said he could've made $700...$100/foot, but logically, however, he traded the massive snake for future car muffler repairs...and perhaps the off chance he'll need something made of skin.

Where do you put the key in the ignition?

I don’t know much about being smart, well except for my Mensa test results and the wins I rack up playing jump the pegs at the Cracker Barrel, but running the Space Shuttle looks really hard. I mean not just your run-of-the-mill hard, or I’ll just spend a little more time on the simulator hard. When I say hard, I mean basically impossible. There’s like three thousand switches and controls in this picture. I’m not being a hater, but if you’re enrolled at the University of Phoenix and your lifelong dream is to become astronaut, you better either make 20 million to pay the Russians for trip to space or decide on another dream because the chances of you going into space for NASA and running this machine is zero.

Call God...an angel is missing.

Abigail Clancy makes looking hot so effortless. Being a girl and standing next to this chick must be the most depressing thing since you stood in the mirror and noticed your hips are becoming your mother’s. Her eyes should be contracted by the Government as a secret deadly weapon against the Taliban because trying to look away from them is completely impossible. She’s so insanely pretty, I couldn’t even talk to her. My social skill set would completely disassemble itself. Crawling in the prone position for 600 yards through landmines and broken glass wouldn’t be 1/10th of the obstacles I would face to see her naked.