At least a spaceship didn't drop her off...

PITTSFIELD — A woman who allegedly intended to artificially inseminate her wife with her brother's semen has been charged with domestic assault and battery.
Pittsfield police responded to a call shortly before 4:30 p.m. Tuesday in the city's Morningside neighborhood, where the assault allegedly occurred.

This story is flippin awesome.

Stephanie K. Lighten, 26, was released on personal recognizance after denying the allegations in Central Berkshire District Court Wednesday morning.

Jennifer A. Lighten, 33, told police that Stephanie Lighten, her wife, was "all liquored up" when she returned to their Lincoln Street apartment, where the defendant then allegedly tried to use a syringe to inseminate her, according to a police report.


Allegedly Stephanie threw Jennifer on the couch, grabbed at her clothes and threatened to impregnate her, police said.

Jennifer broke free, ran into the bathroom and locked the door. Stephanie "then broke the bathroom door down," police said, hurting her wrist in the process.
When Stephanie went to retrieve an ice pack from the freezer, Jennifer bolted from the apartment and attempted to get away in the couple's sport utility vehicle, police said.

As Jennifer pulled away from the scene, Stephanie "jumped on the side of their vehicle, swung the door open and made (Jennifer) stop," Steinman said.

According to Officer John Bassi, a witness at the scene claimed Stephanie "was hanging on the SUV door handle, trying to get into the car." Amber Hunt told Bassi that Stephanie nearly caused an accident when the vehicle narrowly missed hitting a tree in the front yard of Hunt's Spring Street home.

Dammit! I would've loved to be have been a witness to this circus sh!tshow. What is it with crazy lesbians? First Anne Heche aka Celestia, then Stephanie and Jennifer. I would almost bet the jurors of this trial won't even be surprised. I can't imagine testifying in front a juror of my so-called peers that tried to turkey baste my brother's semen into my wife in hopes to impregnate her. We should pass a law that people that commit crimes heinous should be removed of all possibilities of reproduction. That would be one gov't program that I could actually get behind. Instead, we'll give CITI 40 billion.