Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Nancy Pelosi is a Smokeshow!



If I awoke on the operating table from general anesthesia after a blepharoplasty and someone held a mirror in front of me, I would shriek in horror if my eyelids looked like the skeletonous, hybrid sea-monster above. It looks like someone is vigorously sucking the life force and blood out of her, leaving what's left of her facial features seeping and spilling into the crevasses of her eye sockets and foramens. When she speaks, I can't help but notice how one eye is so heroically defiant, always opening at least 30% more than her other less determined one. If I dropped acid and became Nancy Pelosi, I would run from the cops while swerving to hit pedestrians with strollers in hopes they would pull me over and billy club me to death.

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