My apology to my sister and my other two readers for my absence.

This may be hard to believe, but despite being on the cusp of an AIDS vaccine, over forty years of men walking on the moon, and handheld internet devices operating at rates of 4G, COMCAST doesn'tknow if they provide internet to my new home. Did I mention my neighbor two houses down has it? No, they're not joking. I already asked that. When I was a kid, I seriously thought I would be in a flying car by now. Instead, I'm waiting to see if a multi-billion dollar cable monopoly can dig a trench, bury a cable and provide a service that my neighbor, 120 feet away already has. I could turn water into wine or coal into a diamond quicker than this. My life would be so much better without the presence of nincompoops.