Finding a genie that looks like this would present me with a multitude of problems.

I've been asked several times to comment on Hannah Davis, the DirectTV Genie, SI Swimsuit model, and another in the long list of women to get acquainted with Derek Jeter's penis.  The 5'10" Fiona Apple look-a-like, sans heroin, grew up in St Thomas.  I'm still trying to decide how I feel about this chick.  Don't get me wrong, I think she's sexy, but there's almost too much of a good thing going on.  It's as if her features are hyperbolized.  Look, big lips are nice, but not this much.  Blue eyes are gorgeous, but Village of the Damn eyes that can steal your soul is another.  Tall is awesome, but WNBA Big Bird height is something completely different.  Big breasts are fantastic, but...well...big breasts are fantastic.  I'm not trying to be flippant.  I simply just want to tone down things a bit.  These pictures remind me of taking a really hot girl on a walk down River Street in Savannah and stopping at one of those street artists that draw caricatures of people that essentially do nothing but make you feel even more insecure about your one obvious unattractive feature.  Also, I miss the Russian guy on the DirectTV commercials that raised miniature giraffes.  He was awesome.