Thursday, April 14, 2011

Speaking of skinny chicks...oh wait nevermind.




Scarlett Johansson went jogging with her walking cadaver of a boyfriend, Sean Penn, and many of the blogs erupted with rumors she was preggers. Well, it turns out, she's just fat. According to her publicist (read: damage controller), she has been training for six months for her new movie and is in the best shape of her life. I truly don't even know how to respond to that except by saying, "either fire your trainer or fire your publicist." It's amazing how fast a girl can go downhill. One day you're married to the People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive, Ryan Reynolds, and starring in the Iron Man franchise, and the next minute you're disguising your stomach as a human growing inside you by being a competitive eating champion. Couple that with dating an unwrapped mummy from Ancient Egypt and that's probably evidence enough that things are coming off the rails for Scarlett. For the record, if I were a girl, I'd rather marry chlamydia than marry Sean Penn.

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