Celebrities like Gwyneth Paltrow are existential gods.

In an interview with re/Code (don't ask me), Gwyneth Paltrow revealed her insufferable existence yet again.  This time though, it was at the expense of heroes that live and die protecting her freedoms and liberties.  From 1995-1999, I was infatuated with this dumbass...I don't know why.  I feel like I owe every Service Man and Woman a public apology for being so stupid.  I swear to God, every single time this chick opens her mouth, she says something more elitist and abhorrent than the time before.  She is so out of touch with reality that the Silver Spoon has actually imbedded into her colon.  Let's face it...Gwyneth Paltrow has no clue what working for a living means.  Sure, she puts in long hours on a movie set.  BFD.  I've done it.  It's fucking awesome.  I was a nobody and EVERYBODY kisses your ass.  You can literally say and do anything you want and they're like, right this way Mrs. Paltrow.  It's a Devil's occupation that fuels selfishness, insincerity, arrogance, elitism and egomania.  When an actor is actually grounded, I'm instantly a huge fan because it's very difficult to maintain realistic expectations of the world when everyone jumps at your every command.  That said, it sounds like an excuse.  It's not.  She's just a #unt.

Gwyneth's comments equating WAR (real war) to negative TWEETS. (Yes, I mean twitter.)

"You come across (online comments) about yourself and about your friends, and it's a very dehumanizing thing, Paltrow said.  It's almost like how, in war, you through this bloody, dehumanizing thing, and then something is defined out of it.  My hope is, as we get out of it, we'll reach a new level of consciousness."

 In an effort of language warfare, Bryan Sikes, a Green Beret, gives his own retort, in a way only a true selfless hero could:

To Miss Paltrow,I’d first like to start out by saying how terrible I feel for you and all your friends that on a daily basis have to endure mean words written by people you don’t know. I can only imagine the difficulty of waking up in a 12,000 square foot Hollywood home and having your assistant retrieve your iPhone, only to see that the battery is low and someone on twitter (the social media concept that you and all of your friends contribute to on an hourly basis to feed your ego and narcissistic ways), has written a mean word or 2 about you. You’ve hit the nail on the head, war is exactly like that. You should receive a medal for the burden you have carried on your shoulders due to these meanies on social media.You said, “Its almost like, how in war, you go through this bloody dehumanizing thing and then something is defined out of it.” I could see how you, and others like you in “the biz”, could be so insecure and mentally weak that you could pair the difficulty of your life on twitter to my brothers who have had their limbs ripped off and seen their friends shot, blown up, burned and disfigured, or wake up every morning in pain – while just starting the day is a challenge. How about our wives? The ones that sign on to be there for us through thick and thin, that help us to shake the hardships of war upon our return? And do all this while being mothers to our kids, keeping bills in order because we are always gone, and keeping our lives glued together. They do all this, by the way, without a team of accountants, nanny’s, personal assistants, and life coaches. Yeah, reading a mean tweet is just like all that.You know what is really “dehumanizing”, Miss Paltrow? The fact that you’d even consider that your life as an “A-list” celebrity reading internet comments could even compare to war and what is endured on the battlefield. You and the other “A-listers” that think like you are laughable. You all have actually convinced yourselves that you in some way face difficulty on a regular basis. Let me be the first to burst your bubble: a long line at Starbucks, your driver being 3 minutes late, a scuff mark on your $1200 shoes and a mean tweet do not constitute difficulty in the eyes of a soldier.Understand me when I say this: war does not define me. It is a chapter in my life that helped shaped me. Being a husband and father is what defines me. Remember, sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never…be close to what war is.

Thanks Mr Sikes, for your passion, your loyalty and honor to God, Country, and your family, as well as your unyielding bravery.  I hope you know you are treasured and appreciated.

Gwyneth, good luck finding an audience for your next shitty movie.  Piss off.  

Get ready to start cutting....your wrists.

Deadmau5 – $200 – $250K+/show | $21 million earned in 2013

At 23, the Swedish DJ is the youngest artist on our list—and taught himself to produce music using pirated software that he played with from his teenage bedroom.

DJ Pauly D – $40-$60k/show | $13 million earned in 2013

The Jersey Shore star earns half as much per night as some of his DJ brethren, but with 90 performances over the past year and a host of outside business ventures 

I'm sure by now you've either lost conciousness or you've begun plotting your way out out of this world of nonsense that bathes the clowns in luxury for spinning "records" and/or playing hours of prepared mixes and actually doing nothing in front of the stage.  Good for Pauly D, I guess.  If he weren't a "DJ" WETFTM (whatever the f that means), he'd probably be annoying you at your local gym as a "trainer" while he hits on your lonely wife while you're at work daydreaming about running away from your life of bills and overhead.  What, oh your wife doesn't work out?  Sorry bro.  

Charlotte McKinney >>>>>>>> Kate Upton

http://instagram.com/charlottemckinney

Charlotte McKinney is what America tried to make Kate Upton.  Kate Upton is 22.  This is what 22 looks like...or should look like.  These pictures make me looking at Kate Upton feel more like I was teleported to the year 2024 and Kate is a mom of three.  I've never understood the hype around Upton.  She's average AT BEST.  And to all you morons out there that are saying, "Yeah, I'm sure.  If Kate Upton came up to you, you'd have a heart attack."  First of all, no.  Secondly, no.  Kate Upton isn't fat, but she isn't in shape skinny either.  She's what guys really loathe...skinny fat.  Actually, she's more chubby fat...like play-do.  Guys, if you want a cureless square, minus the ginormous breasts of course, resting on two toothpicks, then she's your girl.  I find it insulting really.  It's like society views men so barbaric that we don't care what the chick looks like as long as she has HUGE nat'l geographic breasts and blonde hair.  Ummmm, no.  I like a normal BMI.  I like someone that could go running, and I don't mean to Cold Stone.  I mean actually run.  I'm so sick of this media love fest.  It's annoying and men across the country should be pissed.  When Sports Illustrated has Charlotte McKinney to choose from and they choose this chick, they think you're stupid.  Apparently, they're right.  Morons.  If you want to know who Kate Upton is, go to Hardees.  She'll be the one eating a thickburger.  If you want to know who Charlotte McKinney is, get in line.

WTF?!?^2

It's such a juxtaposition, but as infatuated as I am with supermodels, I don't get most of them.  In fact, to steal from our beloved champion of independence and free thinking President, Barack Obama, "let me be clear", I'm more infatuated with the idea of models than I am with the models themselves.  For instance, I don't find Gisele hot AT ALL.  In fact, I find her UNATTRACTIVE.  Wabt to know why....because I don't like dudes and to be honest, the jury is still out whether she used to be one.  Granted, she's a supermodel, has made more money in the industry than almost anyone, and was the face of Victoria's Secret for years.  All that is bologna if you ask me.  Kate Upton is obviously another one.  I simply don't get it.  There are girls infinitely hotter on every SEC campus every day.  I don't get that Emily Ratjkjdklehflkeshflkowski either.  She was blessed with a God-given bosom, but other than that, and her exhibitionist/love to expose myself mentality, which just FYI is awesome, is just ehhh.  Just ok.  The point is this...Tom Brady looks infinitely more feminine than his wife in almost every picture, especially this one. When I hear a guy talking about how hot Gisele Bundchen is, I immediately think they might be playing for the other team because there's nothing about that woman that screams woman.  Big hands, big feet, adam's apple, strong jaw, etc etc.  Why is she stacking money up like Scrooge McDuck?  Why does she live in a house with MOAT.  An f'ing moat....really?  Why is the world so cruel?  I'll never understand.

Tom...come on bro.  Enough is enough.  This is GD embarrassing.  You look like the love-child of Raggedy Andy and Freddy Mercury.  

War is hell...

Bud Peterson is a bad ass.  Make no mistake.  Being in a dog fight would be insanely intense and scary as hell, but this guy makes it sound like a walk in the park.  I love it when people start ranting about how war never solves anything.  It truly reveals how stupid and indoctrinated people can become.  Here's a newsflash to all the idiots:  War sucks.  No one wants to go to war.  However, war is necessary.  It was necessary in 1945 just like it was in 2001.  Thank God we have heroes like Mr Peterson.  Thank God we have heroes like Lt. Michael Murphy.  When an enemy is circling the skies targeting paratroopers falling defenseless toward the earth, we need those heroes.  When religious zealots orchestrate a complicated plan to attack innocent men women and children just going about their days on that gorgeous Tuesday in September, we need those heroes.  I remember being a child and thinking about the leaders of our country.  I pictured them strong, precise, and wise.  I have never seen that from our President.  I do see him bow a lot to foreign leaders and custom or not, I don't want a bower.  I want a leader.  If that leadership manifests itself as speaking softly, fine, if it's manifested in carrying a big stick and ruling with fear, then so be it.  America needs more people like Bud Peterson and less people like our pitiful out-of-touch Congress and Executive.  It's embarrassing, his mom jeans and backward bike helmet...our esteemed Speaker crying about something he couldn't care less about in an attempt to pander to more idiots.  We need an overhaul, yet instead, we'll just line up and vote like sheep as we always do and it will be a battle of the undecided picking between two completely inept parties and only slightly less inept candidates.  Then for four or six more years, we'll be driven further into debt, stripped of our few remaining freedoms, and with haste and acceleration, spun into a mirror image of a failing Socialists Europe.  I don't know about you guys, but I can't wait.  

It's not all gloom and doom...

So often on this Blog, I'm cynical about humanity, religion, politics, celebrity, etc.  Actually, I'm cynical about pretty much everything.  That's part of the humor and the schtick.  I can never seem to laugh about happy things.  Happy things aren't funny, at least not to me.  I think that's weird, because to be honest, I've never really thought about why I write so negatively.  I think it's because to me, negative sarcasm is funny.  Maybe it's just my twisted sense of humor, or my dedication to being a "realist".  My humor focuses so much on the darker side of life that I tend to keep the other side locked away from this persona. I do love life, however, and try to experience all this amazing and beautiful world has to offer.  All that said, here are some of the stories that have revived my confidence in humanity.  I hope you like these half as much as I did.  

One of the coolest Disney employees ever

If I'm ever in this position, I hope I can be half the father this man is to his son.  

Football players that didn't want a special needs student eating alone.

And last but certainly not least, Derek Redmond at the 1992 Barcelona Olympics.  Every time I see this video, I can't help but think how supportive my parents have been throughout my life.  If you have ever competed at a high level, or dedicated yourself to something that took massive amounts of hard work and dedication, you know what it must feel like to see your lifelong dream shatter in an instant...to be left alone on the track with no one to help when it hurts to move.  This story almost can't be watched without tears.

This is the new America...which is about as successful as the "New Coke"

I had the pleasure of meeting and hanging out with this genius in 1991.  He is truly a legend.  Stand up comedy is so interesting to me. Generally, I find it very unfunny, especially if someone is trying to make me laugh. Laughter should be the by-product of very clever and ironic insight.  Stand-up, at least to me, is all about pointing out the intricacies of life, the mundane things that people tend to ignore as normal.  All the great ones make this seem effortless; Seinfeld is particularly adept.  I wish more people would point out the ineptitude of our Government.  The problem in America though, is most people either aren't smart enough to comprehend or invested enough to care one way or the other.  Nothing in life rattles my cage more than apathy.  Have some stance.  Don't meander through life with no passion for anything.  But, you know, when Gov't rewards mediocrity, stifles technology and job growth, limits small business expansion, urges companies to seek foreign land for tax shelters, and blatantly discourages people getting OFF of Gov't assistance, what's the point in having passion.  These people's passion extends to the voting booth and no further.  Welfare and unemployment have become careers, not a way to keep you afloat until you find something else.  Obama and the democrats want this and encourage this behavior.  If you can't see this, you're an ostrich and you should pull your head out of your ass the sand.  Between the two joke parties in this country completely running it into the ground, the average entrepreneur or American worker that built this amazing nation is doomed.  The only way to regain our position in the world is to send a message to Washington that neither party represents the belief of the populous.  The problem with that is, the paradigm has shifted and instead of the populous being the producers, it has now become the consumers.  We're doomed and it's only a matter of time....that time being less than 100 years.  

A wise man I knew once said to me...

If you want justice, go to a whorehouse...

If you want to get screwed, go to the courthouse.

25 years he will never get back because of arrogant and probably racist legal/police work. What a shame.

My hatred for mankind never waivers

Apparently, people are even dumber than I thought, which for the record, is really really really dumb. Bugchasers are people that search out people infected with the HIV Virus to have sex with in order to contract the virus.  Yes, you read that right.  People actually search out HIV infected people to contract the virus.  WTF is wrong with these numbskulls? HIV isn't herpes or HPV.  This shit is serious.  What's attractive or intriguing about contracting HIV?  It's not like some people beat it, unless they're Magic Johnson, in which the "Magic" is simply 100 dollar bills that allow you 40 pills a day that costs thousands to beat the disease.  I remember being at basketball practice in 7th grade and Magic's press conference came on television.  We all were thinking, "He'll be dead in three years."  Because back then, everyone was terrified of AIDS.  No one knew hardly anything about it.  In 1991, everyone thought the the only way you could've gotten AIDS was to be gay.  Magic changed all that.  I digress.  People are stupid.  Very stupid.  Sure, it's 2014 and HIV isn't necessarily a death sentence, especially if one has money.  That said, who wants HIV?  I joke around about how America is doomed and more and more people are becoming the consumers and less and less people are doing the providing.  It's our ideology in this country that is to blame.  Producing in this country is no longer rewarded.  We penalize success.  We find ourselves apologizing for wealth, for a nice house, for a nice car.  When did this happen to our society?  When did it become faux pas to be successful or demand more from your life?  When did it become a Scarlet Letter to accumulate wealth through hard work and determination?  It's ok for Hollyweird to make billions on films, but not the evil Wall Street.  This country's younger generations have ruined the work ethic, the pride, and the educational desires to remain the beacon of the free market world.  The sad part of that statement is that the majority of this country is too stupid to understand it.

If you can stomach more than 10 seconds you'll last longer than most.

Not that I am an expert on narcotics because my experience with opiates ended when I had my appendix removed and was shot up with morphine.  That said, HEROIN sucks.  It sucks for everyone involved.  It sucks for the user, the parents, the treatment facility and staff, the dealer, the cops, the citizens, God forbid any children, everyone.  When America loses someone like P Seymour Hoffman it's almost as if it's the first person to die of an overdose of drugs.  To be honest, it pisses me off.  Hoffman was a junkie.  Plain and simple.  He was no different than the thousands of people addicted to this life sucking demon.  Hoffman was just like everyone else that falls victim to this drug that shows no discrimination regardless of your race, your background or your income.  He lived in a West Village apartment with a 30,000 a month mortgage, but that didn't stop his death.  Only because he's an actor are people outraged by this tragedy.  I sat in court last week for a traffic ticket and a young pretty girl had witnessed her boyfriend OD on heroin on Christmas Eve and because she tried to hide the evidence, she was charged with tampering, possession, among others.  No one is up-in-arms about this though.  To further my point, I found this video online of a young junkie mother so out of her mind, she couldn't remain conscious long enough to hold her head up or have any clue what was happening to her daughter.  The bad part of this video is no one does anything.  One person videos the madness, but no one does anything.  The drug war is hopeless.  End it.  Now.  Stop spending trillions of dollars on police efforts, smuggling deterrence, non-violent drug offenders filling up our prisons.  Instead, take all this money and move it to treatment.  What we're doing isn't working.  We need to change the defense.  I know this is almost as polarizing as abortion (another debate I'm more than willing to have), but ending the drug war, legalizing drugs and taxing them would eliminate 80% of the violence in the inner city.  I know this will never happen because we still live in a country where conservatives can't process the possibility of evolution being taught in school and democrats can't understand why Obamacare can never work.  The problem in this country is polarization of two parties that can't kick a ball in the ocean standing on the beach.  There are too many problems to count and it's our own fault.  Until people start to approach problems differently, from a place of individual freedoms and free will, our country of greatness is lost.  It's that simple.

Prisoners' letters of advice to their former selves

I don't know about you guys, but I rarely remember dreams.  In fact, when I do remember them, they're usually intense and frightening as hell.  The dreams I tend to remember are a few varieties of the same dream.  I'm either standing on something that breaks and I begin to fall, or doing something very stupid and/or very illegal and going to jail.  I'm sure somewhere there's some obnoxiously pretentious therapist thirsting for the opportunity to overcharge me for their brief and of course callous interpretation of my life and my fears being manifested into a dream of hopelessness and confinement, which in turn, is fueled by fear of commitment and abandonment...or something like that.  Regardless, one's choices made in life aren't always driven by stupidity.  Everyone in jail isn't there because their life path was cloaked in crime and brutality.  Sometimes, probably even often times, these choices were instant, split-second decisions, more often than not influenced by someone else, or forced upon them by a string of bad choices that led them to a life of incarceration.   I certainly regret sounding like a criminal/prisoner apologist, but this exhibit of prisoners' letters to their former selves is brilliant.  I couldn't not read them.  The psychology of criminals, prisoners and prisons in general, have always fascinated me.  See if you find it as fascinating as I do.  

http://cavemancircus.com/2014/02/28/portraits-inmates-letters-advice-younger-self/

Estatic vs Exspecially

Ecstatic vs Exspecially

People.  No.  Stop butchering this language.  It's not difficult.  The improper use of the English language is laziness...nothing more.  When you add letters on everyday words that don't belong, people think you're dumb.  That ESPECIALLY includes me.  Maybe you are, but if you're not, please stop being stupid on purpose.  The charade isn't at all funny.  Next time, take the time to read a dictionary.  Take the time to ensure you know how to read the pronunciation guides with those funny looking characters found in that oh-so-intimidating reference guide.  If you don't, no matter how old you are, it's something good to know.  Learn it and use it as a tool to bounce through this sometimes unfair and hapless life.  I'm sick of hearing these two particularly, but there are literally hundreds more.  I'm happy to expand upon this word list of ignorance and apathy.

2013

To say my life has been in a transitional phase is an understatement.  I've traveled the world, pushed my mind and body to its limits, made some great new friends, and sadly laid some to rest.  I've made more mistakes than I care to admit, but 2013 began to shine a little light.  You know it's funny how people perceive others, even those whom they know and know well.  I feel very privileged and lucky for so many things in my life and it's regretfully been a long time since I've felt that way.  Sometimes it seems, despite people telling you how envious they are of your "life", it's far too easy to get lost in the tempest of feeling sorry for yourself and refusing to give happiness an opportunity to cleanse you.  This year gave me so many opportunities to break; mentally, physically, and emotionally, I was pushed to the breaking point. Here is part of the journey back.

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A Stroll Through Time.

As many of you know, I'm not one for celebrating "thankfulness" on social media.  I'm not sure why, but I'm much too cynical for that expression of gratitude.  I have been asked to blog a little more since I haven't done this in months.  That said, I have been collecting many photos throughout history and like a few of my posts in the past, I'm going to share them with you.  America may not always be right and we might not always be lead by the someone that represents our ideology, but what we are is a nation of people that believe in freedom.  So many of our ancestors have suffered through unimaginable peril so the people after them can live their lives as God intended.  That being said, I hope you enjoy these and I hope they mean as much to you as they did to me.  Happy Thanksgiving.

Working out on the Titanic.  Too bad someone couldn't whisper in his ear that his rowing would be more fortuitous than he can imagine.   

 This is not Sylvester Stallone in Cliffhanger.  This is not a blue screen.  This is a dichotomy of huge balls or small brains.  

This is the result of battle in the South Pacific during WW2

 Their crime is simply being black.  

This is last public execution in America.

"First Do No Harm" would be a tall order.

Gross Anatomy 1890

This is one of the saddest pictures I've ever seen.  

Hitler and his contemporaries admiring the largest caliber single fire weapon ever created.   

50 years ago, the world mourns the loss of John Fitzgerald Kennedy.  

A slave showing just a few of the visible scars.  Those hidden are too many to count.  

Kent State terror.  1970

The hearse of Abraham Lincoln

Marilyn Monroe in a Funhouse.

Medical School 1800's.   

MLK Jr. and his son remove a cross burned in his yard.  This is how you bring people together.  What an amazing Leader of Civil Rights. 1960 

A soldier removing Hilter street sign and replacing it with Roosevelt in WW2. 'Merica!

Harriet Tubman and rescued slaves pose for a picture.  

King Tut's unopened tomb.

US exploding a German U-Boat

Yes it is. Vietnam 1965

Guten Tag

Since Heidi's divorce from this, she's been getting naked and tweeting.  All I can say is, awesome.  I truly don't believe there will ever be a day when her blitz doesn't light my weinerschnitzel. Oh, one more thing...that's after four kids...yeah yeah..let me guess, "If I had a personal chef, plastic surgeon, and personal trainer, I could look like that."  That's when I trail off and walk away.  

F You Rolling Stone

If I or anyone else gave two shits about reading Rolling Stone they wouldn't be grasping at straws with this heinous attempt to stir controversy for the first time in like two decades.  How can this liberal POS call themselves, or better yet, be considered journalism?  I'm not exactly sure why they think this is ok, but I'm sure it boils down to me not being edgy enough or smart enough or open minded enough to not judge him before he gets a trial.  Go f yourself.  This is man is blatantly responsible for the murder, anguish and/or terror of hundreds if not thousands, while all the while being funded and inspired by the oooosopeaceful followers of Islam.  To me, this is nothing but an anti-war slap in the face to all the men and women that have spilled their blood defending this shitty magazines freedom of speech/press etc.  Of course, Rolling Stone has every right to put whomever they want on their cover, just like I have every right to protest and not buy it.  The water you're bucketing out of that sinking ship, you and Playboy for that matter, will never be enough to save it.  I'll be glad when both go down.  Arrogance always loses.

We simply must do better.

I don't know much, but I know mass sex appeal when I see it.  This ain't it.  Kate Upton turned 21 this past week.  Most hot girls could slam 2 pizza and a twelve pack and lose weight when they're 21.  Also, those same girls have thighs that actually change shape around the hips and then again around the waist. Not Kate.  She's dedicated to turning her body into a FedEx package with huge sagging breasts.  I honest to God don't get it.   If her face were stunning, I would be like, "ok...I see that", but that's not even the case.  She looks like a chick you'd see on the beach in Jacksonville or Daytona on her vacation from Youngstown Ohio.  You know, lots of blonde hair, but also lots of black roots.  Would someone please explain the hype around this chick.  There are sooooooo many genuinely hot girls out there:  Kelly Brook, Irina Shayk, Alessandra Ambrosio, Alison Brie, Alex Morgan, Katrina Bowden, Blake Lively, to name a few.  I saw girl in GameSpot today on GT campus prettier than Kate Upton.  That's a lie.  Pretty girls on GT campus don't exist.  They're like unicorns and fire breathing dragons...speaking of fire breathing dragons, GT students love Dungeons and Dragons, but that's neither here nor there.  The point is, please break some ammonia and take a few deep breaths because we have to stop this nonsense guys.  I can't get behind, literally or figuratively, a two-time SI Swim Suit cover model that has a stomach that looks like play-dough and breasts that look like they've nursed Cleveland.  21 years old?  Come on.

Where has our desire, as citizens, to fight for this country gone?

There is a great big problem in this country with our Government.  Too many times these days, the blame is placed on either the parties in this country or the people in power.  In reality, it's neither of those.  The problems all arise from the positions of power in this country.  They are the genesis for all the problems.  The positions are too coveted.  For example, one always leaves office with exponentially more wealth than they started from under-the-table deals and lobbyist "donations".  Also, there are no term limits, there's car limo services paid for by the people, housing, where some most of our elected officials rendezvous with their mistresses and run gay brothels.  There are scores of quid-pro-quos, benefits and retirement until death, to name a few of the ridiculous benefits.  You can't point to political parties as the root of this evil.  People are being molded into sheep.  They are molded and shaped and pointed in the direction of the party urged into.  The things the parties offer in return for a vote creates the sheep.  I don't believe that apathy, indifference and a desire to be taken care of are inherent human traits.  I think it goes against the survival gene that we all inherently exhibit.  After all, it is the impetus for human beings having reproductive success throughout history.  I think independence, liberty and personal responsibility are instinctual.  It is innate.  Our forefathers even knew this to be true.  The contrary are all shaped ideologies.  They're shaped by the people holding the offices and desiring to keep the position.  They all send messages to the impoverished that, "If you join our party, we will take care of you," or "If you join our party, we will protect your liberties."  The enemy is not a political party.  The enemy is the growing desire for the seat and the power within the seat.  Where are the term limits?  What happened to the days when being a Senator or Congressman wasn't your job, rather something you did out of love for country.  Something has to change with the permanence of our politicians.  Something has to change the desire for these positions at any cost to the people these positions represent.  Something has to change in our Government that protects the people, not the elitist leaders in Washington that cannot relate to their constituents.  Something has to be done by the people of this country to regain the control of our government.  We cannot continue to prop up these elected officials for reasons as silly as ballot familiarity or handouts.  We, as a nation, must be smarter.  Instead of transitioning into a nation of individuals disseminating power, we're being led into chains of aristocracy. The time is now.

People like beer it seems.

In the most obvious conclusion of a scientific article ever written, some clowns came to the conclusion that drinking beer...wait for it...makes you want to drink more beer.  NO WAY!


"Researchers have discovered that sensory cues associated with drinking may stimulate certain parts of the brain and cause a craving for more alcohol. Giving people a very small amount of the brand of beer they most frequently consume produced a desire to drink that was correlated with the release of dopamine, a neurotransmitter that helps control the brain’s reward-and-pleasure centers."

I don't want to point out the obvious, but I like beer.  The only time I like beer more is when I taste beer.  I don't know if this study was subsidized by the US Government, but I could've saved them tons of money and come to the same conclusion.  Beer tastes good.  I like Beer.  Beer makes me want to drink more. The end.  You're welcome. 

Note to self: Malaysia is an effing nightmare.

While doing my daily run through the blues news, I noticed a story that stuck out to me.  Upon clicking on said story, I noticed that another story stuck out.  When I read that story, I saw yet another story.  Then I thought to myself, "Holy hell Toto, we're not in Kansas, anymore." 

In a fit of anger following a quarrel with his girlfriend, a drunken man cut off his penis and testicles with a pair of scissors. The 46-year-old man from Jilong city in Taiwan then flushed his severed organ down the toilet bowl, Kwong Wah Yit Poh reported. His girlfriend, whose name and age was not known, could only watch him commit the act in horror. She rushed the man, who was bleeding profusely by then, to a hospital. The report said that after the cut, there was only 3cm of the man's penis that remained. However, he could still urinate. After regaining consciousness, the man could not believe what he did. He freaked out and screamed while his girlfriend was seen praying with her hands clasped outside.

I'm not one to play on racial stereotypes; however, I love it when comedians do because it's funny as shit.  That said, the one thing that I couldn't help but notice was after severing his penis and flushing it down the toilet, there was only three cm left.  Wait.  He couldn't have started with much more than that right?  Scientific evidence shows Asians have the smallest penises.  I'm just a man quoting science.  I mean I understand trying to be a Billy Badass in front of your girlfriend, but I gotta be honest bro, there are certainly more strategic ways of being a boss than cutting off your junk and sending it on a water slide ride through the sewers of Malaysia.  Imagine the dudes working the water treatment plant.  That made for a weird Tuesday.

The daily also reported that a 59-year-old mother took her own life after giving money for the last time to her jobless son. It said that her unemployed 37-year-old son, a drug addict, had been asking money from her often. On Wednesday night, he threatened to kill himself if he was not given NT$80,000 (RM8,000) from his mother, a factory janitor. She gave him NT$40,000 (RM4,000) and then stabbed herself. The son, after learning of his mother's death, sobbed uncontrollably at the police station.

I'm sinking deeper into a dark cloud of depression...

Guang Ming Daily reported that a 15-year-old boy was molested by a man who posed as a police officer. The 5.30pm incident on Tuesday took place in Rawang when the teenager was stopped by the man after withdrawing money at a bank. The man claimed that the teenager had behaved suspiciously and asked to examine his backpack. He then ordered the teenager to follow him on his motorcycle to the police station for a urine test. However, the man took the boy to a secluded area and told him to take off his pants, threatening to arrest him if he did not oblige. Afraid and helpless, the teenager pulled down his pants and the man fondled his private parts for several minutes before abandoning him by the roadside. Ashamed and angry, the teenager lodged a police report, accompanied by his family members, at the Gombak police station.


Holy shit...this is like Dante's 9th layer of hell.  I'd rather walk through Harlem dressed as a white supremacist than be anywhere near the border of Malaysia.  If movies existed in real life, Malaysia would be like Biff's alternate 1985 from Back to the Future II.  There's just sex crimes, hookers, drugs, violence, bad hair and Marty's mom's ridiculous fake rack everywhere in this seedy country.  To think, it's so bad in Cuba that people get on life rafts and fight the ocean for a chance at freedom.  I can't even imagine what these people are doing to get out of that place.  You'd be better off raising your kids in a crack house supervised by the Castro brothers and John Wayne Gacy than letting your kids wake up one more day in the hell of Malaysia.