It's funny, but during times of economic expansion, zombie movies boom while conversely, in times of economic peril, world or government unrest and conflict vampire movies have a resurgence. This isn't my theory, this is factual. I think Lindsay is lost in meth land somewhere between the two because she's pale enough to be a vampire, yet scary enough to be a zombie. Irrespective of how hot this chick once was, she's one more stupid judge letting her off from OD'ing. I mean, it's almost inevitable at this point. She's like a walking Meth Makeover billboard. This chick was one of the hottest redheads in years and now she looks like a less sober Amy Winehouse. I'm not one for hyperbole, but honestly, I'd rather put my penis inside an electric pencil sharpener than Lindsay Lohan. I you're anything like me, you're one with the entertainment industry and are asked to screen culturally important films like, Teeth. If you don't know, which you probably don't, Teeth is about a young woman with a flesh eating vagina. It's as good as you would expect---translation---AMAZING! But that's not the point. The point is that Lindsay Lohan's vagina probably doesn't have teeth, but what it does have will make you wish your penis would get chewed off.
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