Admittedly, I don't know a lot about soccer. I'm learning, but only because my nephew is awesome. If it weren't for him, I'd never watch the sport. I generally only tune in during the World Cup because A, it gives me an excuse to drink obnoxiously in the name of The United States of America, and B, see A. Usually I'm underwhelmed by people running around never scoring. It's just not American in that way. We score. We're back to back World War Champions for the love of God. I've always said, "Get rid of off-sides" and that would increase the scoring. This is usually when soccer enthusiasts try to get physical with me. They lose. But that's neither here nor there. The point of this post, if there is one, is Alex Morgan. If you don't know her, she's a forward for the US National Team and is a complete rocket. There hasn't been a sexier female athlete in a long long time. She's essentially a golden ticket for having athletes as children. She didn't even start playing soccer until she was like 14; three years later, she was playing on the U-17 National Team. That's unheard of in soccer. You know what else is unheard of...her legs and ass. They're on my National Team.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Alex Morgan raises my...enthusiasm.
Admittedly, I don't know a lot about soccer. I'm learning, but only because my nephew is awesome. If it weren't for him, I'd never watch the sport. I generally only tune in during the World Cup because A, it gives me an excuse to drink obnoxiously in the name of The United States of America, and B, see A. Usually I'm underwhelmed by people running around never scoring. It's just not American in that way. We score. We're back to back World War Champions for the love of God. I've always said, "Get rid of off-sides" and that would increase the scoring. This is usually when soccer enthusiasts try to get physical with me. They lose. But that's neither here nor there. The point of this post, if there is one, is Alex Morgan. If you don't know her, she's a forward for the US National Team and is a complete rocket. There hasn't been a sexier female athlete in a long long time. She's essentially a golden ticket for having athletes as children. She didn't even start playing soccer until she was like 14; three years later, she was playing on the U-17 National Team. That's unheard of in soccer. You know what else is unheard of...her legs and ass. They're on my National Team.
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